Greatest Rap Battle of Our Time!

This was sent to me by a loyal reader that I will refer to as the Crabcake Heiress. Its really got it all and I think you will all enjoy it.

My friend Brian says that when Eli's eyes roll into the back of his head its because he's actually looking into his brain for the next rhyme he is going to spit.

Also, I take offense to the judging. The man-love going on at the judge's table aside, these clowns don't know jack. That dude Envy rhymed "cripple" with "cripple," which as we all know is a cardinal sin in the rap game. That's the type of weak-ass buster shit that gets you laughed out of the cypher.

Eli's rhymes were way more clever. He was spitting about Rosie O'Donnell and bisexual bridal showers and gay parades. Way better than Envy's mundane bullshit.

I really wish Hammond High had one of these sick lunchtime shows going on. That would have been off the chain. I think my boy Greg would have come with some sick Das EFX-style flows about raw dogging it with girls and being on lockdown. He was an MC for the people.