Friday, December 18, 2009

MTV Does Not Air the Punch Heard 'Round the World

So for once, MTV took the high road and opted not to air the footage of Snooki getting dropped like a bad habit. Instead they cut away to a black screen and then showed the aftermath with her friends and roommates going after the dude and the cop slamming him onto the hood of the car and saying very dramatically "You're going to jail!" Meanwhile Snooki was on the ground crying because, let's be honest, she took a shot to the face. She was worried that she had some teeth knocked out. She did not.

Despite all my bluster before, she really didn't deserve to get hit at all. The dude was way out of line. He was really drunk and kept stealing the crew's drinks. He's lucky that Ronnie and The Situation didn't get their hands on him. That cop got there really quick.
After the episode, MTV aired a message decrying violence against women and gave some info about women's organizations and stuff, which is the right move, but is not going to get the kids excited about heading to the Shore.

Despite this, the episode was my favorite so far. It showed Pauly D and The Situation working two sets of girls at the club and then ditching the set they took home for the other set that showed up at the house. It was awesome to watch them maneuver. Pauly D took one for the team so The Situation could hook-up and dealt with the pissy, ugly girlfriend who was referred to on the program as"The Grenade," as in "falling on." That was really embarrassing for the girl, but she was a c-block all night, so screw her. Its her own fault for going home with those guidos.

The other highlight was my girl J-Woww's dealings with her boyfriend. This relationship is clearly not going to last and it seems that the only two who don't get that are J-Woww and the boyfriend. As usual they were fighting. Then the boyfriend's friend spied on J-Woww when they went to Karma that night and told his boy that she was grinding on some tool bag with a blow-out (Pauly D) all night long. J-Woww managed to diffuse the situation by explaining that they were playing house music and they were only battling on the dance floor. Once Snooki corroborated the story things were cool.

I love how this is a valid excuse in Jersey.

Me (to my fictitious, traitorous NJ girlfriend): I heard from my boy that you were grinding on some douche with a blow-out all night!

Her: Baby, no! We were dancing to house music! We were just battling on the dance floor.

Me: Oh baby, I'm so sorry. I had no idea. Are you OK? Did anyone get hurt?

Her: No. I'm fine.

Me: I lost a lot of good friends to house music dance battles. Too many. They were good men.

And... SCENE!

Tune in next week for another NJ Shore Playhouse production!


  1. The King of New YorkDecember 18, 2009 at 1:23 PM

    Great recap. Entertainment Weekly should give you a job.

    MTV knows everyone already saw the punch so now they get to avoid some hate mail and protests from another special interest group.

    But I can only give Pauly D 3 out of 5 fist pumps as a wingman. He gets major points for agreeing to the chick swap because his other chick was much hotter. Plus he did try to entertain that Blond C-Block but lost interest early. Really falling on the grenade means showing her the Pauly D piercing. That would have kept her quiet for the extra 30 seconds The Situation needed to finish the job.

    **Spoiler Alert** - The "Situation" is revealed in the season finale. The "Situation" is herpes.

    Mike -

  2. I can't disagree with your assessment. The Situation did not close the deal and that was partly because of Pauly bailing on him.

    How great was it when Pauly just turned around on the stairs and left? I'd give that four fist pumps for awesome TV.