Saturday, September 5, 2009

Paranormal Activity: The Supposed Scariest Movie of the Year

So here is something that I thought you guys might like. This new movie, Paranormal Activity, was apparently the bee's knees at Slamdance, the alternative film festival held during Sundance. I was reading online and in my favorite pop culture magazine, Entertainment Weekly, that this movie is one of the scariest films to come out in a long time.

The trailer is kind of creepy but nothing so bad that it will scare the pants off of anyone. But here is the issue. This movie isn't in a position to hype itself up since its coming out of nowhere. All they need to do is tease some film geeks into the theater at a film festival and they win. I don't think that is particularly hard to do. Now that they have established word of mouth they can let the dudes on the Internet (like me!) spread the word and help fill theaters.

My point in all of this is that the trailer probably does not show you anything at all. They save it for the movie. This sounds great to me but at the same time it kirks me the hell out. I was watching the trailer with the cursor ready to close the entire web page. I like a good horror movie but the ones I enjoy the most (ie the ones that scare me) are the ones that give me the creeps.

You can keep your Friday the 13th bloodbaths and your Saw-series torture porn. If a movie tricks me into thinking about it, I'm done because my imagination will absolutely horrify me and keep me from sleeping for many nights. This movie seems like it might be in that vein. So now for a little background: a couple thinks their house may be haunted so they set up cameras to record any paranormal activity (that's the title of the movie so you know they get some!).

From what I can glean from the trailer they find a lot of this shit and the wife is left banging her head against the bed in the end. Presumably because she went insane with terror! Or maybe she just likes to rock out. To each his own. I'm not here to judge.

So anyway this movie could be cool. I shall let you all be the judges. Enjoy the trailer.

Who's coming with me to see it?

UPDATE: The fellaters at Ain't It Cool News are losing their minds over this. The movie's home page says that people are so scared that they are literally shaking in the theaters. They also say that it will leave an imprint on you psyche! That is some serious shit. I would love to see a movie that changes my mental make-up through unbelievable terror. I hope someone goes insane when I see it.


  1. This review made me giggle.

    "Possibly the Scariest Movie Ever Made and the Best Reason to Wear Diapers at the Cinema... Paranormal Activity is not for the weak hearted and is one of the few films that stays with you after you’ve left the theater to the point that you wished it wouldn’t. Paranormal Activity is our generation’s The Exorcist" - BlueBomber

    I call bullshit. Everyone knows that the best reasons to wear a diaper to the movies so you don't miss anything and get the added bonus of sitting in your own filth. Its toasty warm!

  2. I got goose bumps like a mother after watching that trailer.

  3. being a chicken, who got scared watching Blair Witch and ran from a Halloween ghost thingy. I probably won't. That trailer was scurry nuff fho me.

  4. I didn't even think the trailer was all that scary. I guess I was expecting to see something creepy on the camera.

    Brian, are you talking about the time you freaked out in the haunted house in Hershey Park? Didn't you drop into the fetal position when the drama club cornered you? Incidentally, we should head back there this year. Or to Busch Gardens. I'm jonesing for some amusement park action.

  5. the trailer alone drove me insane with terror. scarier than the haunted clown asylum at busch gardens, with greg screaming "look behind you! look behind you!" directly in my ear as i bolted, panic-stricken, through the ride.

  6. Hey that clown wasn't supposed to touch me. I needed an adult!!!

  7. Xani, you are lucky you didn't look (or did you?)... I'm still dealing with it today...

  8. Yeah that clown asylum was pretty decent.

  9. wanna know how much of a bitch i am? i can't even press "play" on the embed.